Pop Rocks

What the hell did they do to Pop Rocks? It has been years, lots of years since I last had them. And let me tell you....they took the pop and the rock out of that action. It would appear that they too have been altered from their pure, perfect state to be more user friendly and "safe" for all. I could not be more disappointed. Yet another example of how our current culture has stripped the edgy rawness out of something powerful, and left us with a watered down, mediocre, easy-to-swallow version. And yes, they were powerful.....very powerful.

It was the experience of eating these candies that first introduced me to the eroticism of mixing a bit of pain with my pleasure. Oh, and the danger!! All those urban myths about people blinding themselves by putting Pop Rocks in their eyes, or kids dying from eating them and drinking Coke at the same time. Who could resist them? Simply put....for me and my prepubescent third grade class, Pop Rocks were sex. We didn't know it at the time, but for some of us, we were laying the ground work for what would become a healthy appetite for all things that....hurt so good.

How did you eat them? Did you put them on your tongue...one at a time? Did you bite down gently, exploding the rock between your teeth? Or did you pour the whole package in your mouth at once, and just let the shrapnel fly? Did that unique combination of caution and intrigue awaken something inside of you? Maybe you've never thought about it....but I have. And Pop Rocks were definitely the S&M candy of my youth. If you loved them, and you aren't embracing your inner sub/dom.....what are you waiting for? Let your freak flag fly, my friend.

Single Girl

Ok, so I drank the kool aid. I didn't really have a choice. They started feeding it to me long before I knew what it was. My whole life I sucked down that sweet concoction made up of the idea that my purpose in life was to find a person to marry. That everyone's purpose in life is to search for a mate, and that only through such a discovery could one experience the reward of true happiness and satisfaction. What bullshit.

Don't get me wrong....people can be beautiful together. I've seen love, I believe in it. And I've seen relationships that are amazing and that foster true happiness and satisfaction. Sadly, I don't see them often...but I know that they exist. And that knowledge is what keeps me single. I see no reason to be in a relationship that is less than that. So, when people ask me why I'm single....I impart this "wisdom" and then watch as they mull it over. Then, slowly but surely, the vast majority of them will reach for that kool aid and take another comforting sip of what assures them that they are on the right path in their own life. And then I get the look. The look that says, ya right....you would be married in a hot second if you had the chance. Guess again. I've been down that road, and what I know for sure is that until my guy is the absolute right guy....I'm riding solo.

And how about that absolute right guy? Some say I'm too picky, that he doesn't exist. But I've seen him too, so I know that he does. I've actually known two of them, which encourages me even more. If there are two that I know of, then somewhere in the dark corners of the world, more are hiding. And the last thing I want to do is be in a relationship with the wrong person, when the right one comes along.

So, for the people who ask me why, and for those who want to set me up with their single friends and family, and also for those who look at me with concern in their eyes......please don't. This girl is just fine right where she is at. She has embarked on a new adventure, and to the extent that she can be, given all of her compexities....she is happy too.